


Bra, You Have Failed This Felicity

by whoseeswhatsyetunseen



Series: Arrowcave Adventures [2]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alive Tommy, Alternate Canon, Awkwardness, Bra Fail, Breasts, F/M, Gen, Humor, Second Base, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-22
Updated: 2014-02-22
Packaged: 2018-01-13 09:05:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1220530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whoseeswhatsyetunseen/pseuds/whoseeswhatsyetunseen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Felicity is having a really bad bra failure issue as she arrives at work.  And none of these "boys" can relate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bra, You Have Failed This Felicity

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sure every woman reading this (maybe some dudes, too, I don't judge) will know exactly how/where the inspiration for this story came from...sigh.
> 
> Also, I don't know if I stole "you have failed this Felicity" from the show, a fan video, or another writer--I apologize now if it was you. It's too good a line to NOT steal it...
> 
> As always, I don't own these characters, I just use them, (insert evil laughter here).

"You do know that there are cameras in here, right Lis?" asked Felicity's former cubical mate Erin.

Felicity wrinkled her nose at the red head but didn't stop groping herself under her cardigan in a frustrated attempt to fix her stupid bra.

"I don't care. I'm sure the security guys have seen worse." She groaned, almost a growl...huh, wonder who she picked THAT up from.

Erin laughed. "If you need help, maybe we could make this show a bit more interesting for the poor guys."

"Ha ha," Felicity rolled her eyes.  Erin just shrugged.

"You only have five more floors until we get to my floor. Now or never, Feli--"

DING.

The elevator stopped and the doors slid open.

"Ehrup!" Felicity smothered a squeak and quickly removed her hands from her breasts.

"Good morning, Mr. Queen!" Erin grinned wildly. "Erin, Ashton, sir, Felicity's former office buddy." She stuck out her hand as Oliver and Diggle stepped into the suddenly tiny space.

Oliver smiled pleasantly and took her hand.  "Pleasure, Ms. Ashton." His eyes shifted to his very silent, very flushed EA.  "I hope I haven't made it too boring for you since stealing her away."

Felicity cleared her throat.  "Erin, this is John Diggle," the two shook hands, "and his job description is too long for an elevator ride." He smiled at her.  "As is mine."  She pointedly glanced at her boss.

DING.

"Well, it was nice finally meeting the men in my friend's life," Erin flashed a wicked smile as she stepped out.  "Let me know if you need any more help with your bra, Lis!"

"ERIN!!" But her friend was already gone, the doors closing.

Light classical music played softly, in stark contrast to the tension playing Felicity.  She decided ignoring that comment was best. Yup, never happened.

Oliver and Diggle exchanged confused, but interested, looks.  Oliver tilted his head and opened his mouth.

"Don't." She held up her hand, shushing him.

"Oh-kaaay," he whispered behind a smirk.

_Holy crap on a cracker, could this elevator be any slower?!  And, well, that's just great, now my bra is digging into my side and my boob again. Don't fidget. Do not, do not..._

But it was seriously painful and her body did a weird, desperate wiggle twist before she could stop it.

"Felicity? You ok?" Diggle asked cautiously.

"Do I look ok?!" she snapped, the wire biting deeper.

DING.

"Oh about frackin' time!" And she shot out and down the hall to Oliver's office and into his private bathroom.

Oliver and Diggle followed, at a normal and slightly wary pace, into his office.  And then they stood looking at each other and the closed bathroom door.

"What..." started Oliver.

"I have no clue." Diggle whispered.

"You think we should," Oliver gestured to the door.

Diggle held up his hands.  "Be my guest, Oliver."

"What, hey, YOU'RE the one who's been married!" Oliver's eye got round.  "This IS a woman, thing, right?"

"YOU are the guy that's dated half the women around!"

Oliver frowned at his friend.  Fine. He was a masked crime fighter, he was CEO of a huge company, he had survived hell, and he could knock on a damn door.

He cleared his throat and walked to the door.  "Felicity? Are you ok?"  Silence.  "Uh, you need any help--anyTHING! Do you need anything?!" Diggle laughed.

The door opened. The first thing Oliver noticed was some pink lace hanging out of her hand.  So, of course, his eyes rose and looked right at her bra-free breasts.  The somewhat rigid fabric of her shirt only did so much to conceal her—

"Yes.  I took off my bra.  Those are my breasts." He snapped his eyes to her face.  "Yea you! You found my eyes," she said in a monotone voice.

She marched out and sat at her desk, stuffing her ruined bra into the trash and covering it with Kleenex.

Oliver and Diggle followed her and stood near her desk as she ignored them.  The two men exchanged looks again.

"Felicity?" Oliver asked.

"Hmm?" she murmured as he typed.

"Why is your bra in the trash can?"  Not a question he thought he would ever be asking anyone!

"Because that is where I put broken, useless things."  She pushed a file across her desk. "That new report you asked for."

Oliver frowned.  "Why is your bra broken," and when she sighed and rolled her eyes at him, he raised his voice. "Fel-ic-ity...why?"

Diggle snorted and returned to Oliver's office.  Felicity chewed her lip and wrinkled her nose.  Oliver just continued to stare at her.  And continued ignoring her one-layer-closer-assets.

"They don't last forever, you know, Mr. Queen," she grouched out in annoyance.  "Do you seriously want to know why I am braless in the office of the CEO of Queen Consolidated?!" She used her loud voice and found herself standing suddenly.

"Uuhh hmmm..." Tommy's voice snapped both the CEO and EA's faces over toward the elevators.  "Oh wow, do you guys practice that move?" He walked up to stand at Oliver's side in front of Felicity's desk and grinned down at her.

"What do you want, Mr. Merlyn?" Felicity sighed.

His grin widened. "To be honest, I have completely forgotten. I'm much more intrigued by you not wearing a bra at work." He waggled his eyebrows and Oliver growled at him.  Tommy just laughed.

Felicity had had enough.  

THEY were men.

THEY never had to wear a bra.

THEY never had to continue doing their jobs with a metal stick digging into their tender parts, or monthly have THEIR boobs suddenly too big for any of the bras in the dresser.

"Think this is funny, boys?!" She marched around her desk. The "boys" hastily tried retreating into Oliver's office but she just chased them.

Diggle's eyes widened when he saw her expression. And when all three "boys" were backed against a wall, a fuming Felicity gripped her top and yanked it up, exposing her tummy and most of her left side and arm pit to six shocked eyes.

"There! Does that look FUNNY?" And she pointed to a red, irritated and ugly scrape under her arm pit.  "That is why my bra is in the trash, you dumbasses."

Diggle whistled in sympathy.  Tommy mumbled "shit, Lis!" And Oliver sucked in a breath.

A few moments ticked by. The mood of the room went from aggravated to shock to awkward. Felicity suddenly realized she was basically flashing her boss and friends at work; she blushed and pulled her shirt back down.

She turned to run...somewhere, but a firm hand on her elbow pulled her back.  She looked up into Oliver's concerned face but did noticed Tommy and Diggle eagerly turn and walk across the room.

Oliver and Felicity just stared at each other, trying to communicate with words.  Felicity's earlier feminist gusto had fizzled away under everyone’s gaze.

"Come here," he whispered the order against her cheek before guiding her into his private bathroom and closing the door.

"Ol--." she mumbled but her shook his head and reached for her, his fingers skimming her waist and gently pushing her top up like she had done.  He took her arm and placed her hand on his shoulder as he bent slightly to examine the scratch.

She caught a glimpse of them in the mirror and it was so ludicrous looking that she exhaled a harsh giggle and swayed slightly.

Oliver responded by gripping her tighter and this only made her tickle reflex engage.

"Ahh-LIV-eeer! Stop!" She twisted, yanked down her arm, her elbow nailed the top of his forearm and his other hand somehow got shoved up her shirt and onto her—

"Ooohhh--hhh," she panted when his hand seemed to grip her bare breast under her shirt.

His eyes widened.  "Shit, didn’t mean, I wasn't, shit." She started to giggle again as his face got confused.  He was so cute, all flustered!

"Felicity," he scolded and he attempted to untangle himself. But that only made him graze more of her ticklish skin, which made her laugh and wiggle again, which made him growl and become even more entangled in her shirt and arms and breasts...

"Seriously, Oliver!" she panted. "Stop tickling me!"

"Stop wiggling, seriously!" he fired back at her with his Arrow voice. And of course, this made her laugh harder.  _This is so weird!_ she thought to herself.  And she choked on a giggle.  Oliver growled again and her knees gave out as she closed her eyes and laughed harder.

RRRRIIIIIIIPPP!

Felicity's eyes popped open.  She was on her knees; her face, wet with laugh-tears, was level with Oliver’s fly; one of her hands was covering her heart, the other was gripping Oliver’s pant leg for balance.

And Oliver was slack jawed and gazing down at her.  In his hands were pieces of her shirt...two separate pieces.

She looked down even as she felt the chill meet her exposed skin.  Yup, her girls were exposed in all their glory.  They were starting to tighten and point right at her damn dream fodder, Oliver Queen.   _FUUUUCK!_

"Uh, umm," was all he could manage.

"Well," she added like an idiot.  He dropped her destroyed shirt and offered his hand to her. When she took it, he easily pulled her up and into him, hands moving to cover her bare biceps.

"Sorry," he whispered. But she noticed he didn't look too sorry. He looked, almost, pleased with himself. She saw him very kindly looking right into her face and no lower, but the fact still remained that she was half naked and pressed against her boss in the bathroom at work.

Hmmm. Yeah.

A harsh knock on the door made her squeak, causing her nipples to rasp over Oliver’s suit clad chest.  He sucked in a quick breath.

"Everything ok?" asked Diggle through the door.

"Yes, we don't like all the quiet," added Tommy.

Oliver turned his back to Felicity, and the mirror, thank goodness, not that it mattered NOW, and removed his suit jacket.

"Here," he held it out behind him and she quickly put it on.  "Ok?" His voice was lower and rougher than she could ever recall him using, completely different from the stern Arrow voice.

"Yes, thank you," she whispered to his flexing shoulder blades.  He nodded and opened the door.  Felicity grabbed the shirt pieces from the floor and followed him out.

"What," Diggle was shaking his head and glaring at Oliver.

"What happened in there, guys?!" smirked Tommy, eyes flying between them.  Then he spotted the shirt fragments.  "Damn, Oliver, did you--"

Oliver turned on Tommy in the blink of an eye. He invaded his best friend's personal space and whispered angrily, "you do NOT want to finish whatever you were about to say."

"Oliver," Felicity rolled her eyes.

"Well, then," Tommy said firmly back into Oliver's face. "You tell us what all that laughing, and silence, and shirtless Felicity means, hmm?"

Felicity caught Diggle's eye and they exchanged a look of "good grief" regarding Tommy and Oliver's interaction.  Diggle grinned and Felicity shrugged.

"It was an accident. Oliver was examining," she glared at Tommy's chuckle, "my bra-inflicted wound. His hand hit a very ticklish spot on my side and I kinda spasmed, and started to fall and he grabbed my shirt..." She held up her former shirt. "Oliver one, shirt zero."

Tommy laughed. "Only the two of you would go in there like you did and come out with that story."

"It's true!" she shouted at him.

"We know," laughed Diggle.  "That's why it's so funny."

Oliver ground his teeth. "Fine. We all got to laugh. Diggle, please drive Felicity home so she can get dressed."

Oliver poked Tommy in the chest. "Tommy, go to work."  

His face softened when he looked briefly at Felicity.  "You can come back or just take the day..."

They searched the other's face again, trying to communicate but it was a lot less effective with an audience.

"I think I will take the rest of the, well, the whole day, off."  She moved toward her desk and again the guys moved ahead of her.  "Sorry, for my flashing you all back there," she blushed again.

"No, it's ok, Lis," Tommy assured her.  "I hate bras, too." She saw him wink. "Later, guys!" And he quickly left.

Oliver waited until she was about to pick up her purse, putting a soft hand on her shoulder.  "I'm sorry, too," he said softly so Diggle couldn't hear.  "That wasn't how I ever imagined reaching second base with you."

But before she could respond he had let go and was striding back into his office.  She just stood stunned, hand hovering over her purse straps.

"What did he say?" demanded Diggle.

Felicity bit her lip and then took a deep, shuddering breath. "Just, uh, sorry for ripping my shirt," she managed to get out.

Diggle looked back in at Oliver and then down at Felicity.  "Uh-huh, ok."

He moved away to push the elevator call button.  Felicity compose herself, made sure that Oliver's coat was as closed up as it could be, and joined Diggle at the elevators.

After a few seconds, Diggle cleared his throat.  "So," he continued to watch the floor numbers illuminate. "Just how did he get to second and why did he need to apologize for it?"

"You heard?!”

DING.

Diggle moved into the empty elevator.  "Nope. But thanks for confirming that missing part of the story." She gaped at him and really wanted to stamp her foot.  "You getting on, or what, Felicity?"

**Author's Note:**

> (huh, weird, had to edit it a few times after posting because it randomly left some words out! Sorry, and please tell me if I missed anything, I hate typos too.)


End file.
